Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Little Christmas Cheer

So me and my boy Zaq were talking about Christmas and he made the argument that Christmas was what was really hood right now and I was like naaaaah, what about Christmas is hood.  Then I got to thinking.  What if Santa was a big Black man... Like Rick Ross.  What if Santa looked like Rick Ross, what would it be like?  And from there, this came to me. Enjoy. Merry Christmas

Santa (The Claus...)

Elves don't make love, baby they make presents
Come to the Pole, my elves get gift crackin
Always wear a beard, baby cause shit happens
When I'm at the Pole I push a red and green Phantom
Hopped out the Phantom, hopped in the sleigh
Had to let the top back, "Hey Rudolph its the day" (hey!)
Who gives a fuck what a Grinch gotta say?
Made a billion kids happy last year from my sleigh (geah)
Flyin' through the skies, deers strapped in the reins
Kids believe in me, so they chantin' my name (Claus!)
I'm the biggest Claus that you seen thus far
9 flying reindeer cross the world in a day
I'ma make it rain (rain), presents in my sack (sack)
Good or bad I got your name, lil' homie, that's a fact
I enter through the chimney, presents under yo' tree
Slangin presents in your hood, you hear my ho's on your street

(T-Pain bridge)
Look under your Christmas tree and you know you'll see gift
Found some coal in your stocking, oh ain't that a bitch
I'm on my job (yea!), and I ain't takin' off
Cause its just a Christmas day in the life of the goddamn Claus!

(Rick James voice) BANG! BANG! AH HA HA HA HA!

Merry Christmas, y'all!