Tuesday, January 6, 2009

The Tragedy that is... Laura Bush

Now some of you may be going, "Chris... where the HELL are you going with this???" Here is the set-up: I was checking out CNN.com this evening, you know... trying to be a responsible citizen of the world and find out what is going on and such.  One of the headlines is "Laura Bush signs deal to write memoir and share 'intimate details'" So naturally I click the link on some "What the f--k is this" type shit.  So I'm reading, and I quickly lose interest after about 3 sentences, but I did read something interesting.  Although everyone hated Bush, Laura was generally loved by the public.  And I say to myself, "Hermmmm. I wonder if I have ever held any ill feelings towards Laura Bush?".  And I thought, and thought, and never was there a day when I was like "MAAAN! Laura Bush is whack as hell!". She wasn't even collateral damage on some "F--k Bush! And Laura can take 2 of these and walk it out too!".  Honestly, she seems like a really nice woman and I feel bad for her.  I'm pretty sure she was like... a librarian or something before she married Bush, and she married this rich kid from Texas and ended up becoming the first-lady.  Now this could have been a Cinderella type story, but unfortunately the guy she married was more like Elmer Fudd than Prince Charming... assuming Elmer came from money.  But seriously, she seems like such a nice lady.  Like, that lady that lives on your block who has a biggoted retard for a husband.  And one day your ball rolls in their yard while he is cutting the grass, and he calls you all types of crispity crackley crunchity coons and like pops your ball with some gardening scissors.  All the while, kind Mrs. Bush is watching from the window, shaking her head in disgust.  Mr. Bush goes in the house angry, and Mrs. Bush slips out, and tells you in the kindest voice that she is sorry that he behaved like that, and should have treated you that way.  And then she tells you to come back in an hour, when Mr. Bush is at his "fraternity meeting" that requires a white robe and pillow case, and she will bake you her world famous chocolate chip cookies.  Like.. that is the type of woman that Laura Bush is to me.  Like, while Dubya was off playing John Wayne with the Middle East, Laura was back in the U.S. reading to little kids... and baking her world famous chocolate chip cookies to send over in those care packages they dropped in like Afghanistan and Iraq.    


CC said...

c. ruck why did you read my mind on the what the f is this post about? I think she has a tad of an alien look in her eyes though. that might be her "secret".